The Seven Profitable Habits of Self Help Gurus

Ever your guide and mentor, Little Nicky has been alarmed at the proliferation of business blogs selling self help programs here recently.
Don’t be conned, you too can be a rich, successful Self Help Guru, just follow Little Nicky Machiavelli’s guide (below.)

The title is a shameless parody of Steven R. Covey’s multimillion selling “Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” of course. And why not, he is one of the leading exponents of a craft I am about to debunk.
Around fifteen years ago, as a consultant, I frequently used to come across people who would speak of Covey’s book in the reverential tones religionists reserve for their sacred texts.
The book (Covey’s book not The Book) was about success, or as D.H. Lawrence put it “the bitch goddess success,” so it was perfect bedtime reading for the driven young executive because it seemed to offer the obsessively ambitious a shortcut to their goal.
Another book that made somebody rich bore the title “In Search of Excellence.” This looked at the qualities that make a successful organisation.
In a society built of selfishness the self – help industry had tapped a rich vein.
Since then self help books have become a major industry.
It could be said that the books enslaved people as effectively as an addictive drug and the psychology of self help is certainly similar, the unfulfillable promise is there, the great secret will be revealed of how to achieve not the best time you ever had but: promotion, wealth, status, happiness, a fulfilling relationship, perfect mashed potatoes – no, scrub that one – and popularity. All anybody needs to do is read the book, apply its techniques and everything will just happen.
And if it doesn’t, you are a failure, loser, dick – head, a no – mark. Go down that road and you only have one place to turn. More self help.
Surveys have shown that despite the self – justifying claims of those who followed the advice offered in self help books, they have not actually done better on average, nor have their businesses. Publishers may produce the one person in a hundred who can truthfully say …

CLICK HERE to read all The Seven Profitable Habits Of Self Help Gurus.

6 thoughts on “The Seven Profitable Habits of Self Help Gurus

  1. I am very surprised that people are still falling for get rich quick/easy/by doing nothing schemes and books etc. Its all just so much bullshit. Guess greed will always win over common sense!!

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    1. Desperation as often as greed I think. A lot of young professionals I met were deeply troubled by the fact they were not senior consultants or CEOs at thirty. They can’t seem to understand that simply wanting it is not enough.

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  2. I just love those small ad venturers who advertise ” make a million in a year with this secret new sales programme”.

    So if they know all about THAT, why put a 50 squid ad in Exchange $ Mart looking for victims to hand them 20 squid for a ‘report’?

    The mugs who do deserve everything they’ve got coming I say.

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    1. Me & my bro once had a bet on which scam one of these “I can show you how to be rich overnight” ads was using. We sent of £10 and when the reply came back he won. It said “put and ad in the papers saying “I can show you my successful program that turned be from a failure into a millionaire – send £10 to this box no.”

      But bro. is a market trader, he knows about these things. I thought it would be provinding source material for chapbooks on how to make money. Too complicated, it was just a single sheet of paper with three or four lines badly typed on it.

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  3. You forgot to add one more thing, I hope you were in your pyjamas writing this stuff and earning £5000 per week while you sleep with the earn eezzee system!!!! If all these schemes were that good we’d all be doing it.

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